Thursday, September 09, 2010

2 and 1/2 Weeks and Counting.....

I cannot believe how fast my time off has flown by.  I have been home since the beginning of July after my second stay in the hospital for hernia problems during my pregnancy.  The month of July crawled because we were waiting for Mr. Luke to arrive.  Once he was born, the time started to fly.  The spectrum of emotions I have felt during this time is indescribable.  The one feeling though that tops all of the rest is the purest, deepest love I have ever experienced.  When Luke was born, the moment I heard his cry, my heart doubled in size.

So - with a much bigger heart now - there is double the heartache when I think about returning to work.  It really is a very confusing time for me.  On one hand, I want to spend every minute of every day with him.  I don't want to miss a sound, a move, any facial expression.  On the other hand, I miss the charge a hard day of work gives me - the sense of accomplishment.  I know many many working Moms who manage to have a wonderful family life and kids who are happy and healthy.  I have decided that working will make me an even better Mommy.  See I'm very good at what I do and I enjoy the daily challenge that my career in Financial reporting gives me.  I also enjoy working with other people and helping to cultivate the careers of those around me.  I believe that the sense of accomplishment and satisfaction I get from working, will make the time I spend with Luke that much better quality.  He will also get to see that his Mommy is smart and driven and has a career of her own that she excels at.  In other words, I believe that my keeping and building upon the identity my career gives me, will allow me to be a very good example for Luke.  For some Moms, it is absolutely the right thing to stay home with their babies.  I don't think that one choice is better than the other - I just think there are different choices for different Mommies.  Both choices can result in a wonderful family life with happy, healthy kiddos.  I think the most important thing for a Mommy is that she know herself well enough to make the right choice.

So - with that said... I have started to come to terms with the fact that we will start school for Luke on September 27th - the day I return to work.  I am calling it school because it makes me feel better than calling it day care :)  I called the Montessori Academy at Westridge (the school we have decided on) today to see if I could bring Luke in before I actually have to go back to work in order to ease both of us into this transition.  They seemed very prepared for crazy overprotective Mommies and told me that we could use the 2 business days before the 27th as our transition period.  So, on Thursday September 24th, Tim and I will go to school with Luke for the day.  We get to be there and experience everything that he will.  On the 25th, we will actually leave him for a while.  Then the 27th is our official first day.  Being able to go with him the entire first day makes me feel much better.

Over Labor Day weekend, we took Luke on his first overnight trip to see Nana and to go to his cousins' first birthday party.  The first day of our trip was not great.  Luke was way overstimulated the day of the party and was extremely fussy.  We weren't able to be outside with everyone much - but that's babies!  The next few days were much much better!  I planned and tried to stay one step ahead of Luke's every need LOL.  I created a special sleeping oasis for him at our hotel.  He was cozy and had his sound machine to make him comfortable while he slept.
Fold-out couch made into bed and changing area for Luke!


Luke also got to meet his Nana for the first time.  Nana loved on him and he was one happy little boy!
Luke also got to meet his great Aunt Laverne and cousins Pat and Christy, plus Christy's husband David and their sweet kids Eric and Kayli.  Tim's friends Wade and Teri also paid us a visit while we were there and Sunday we visited Northwest Hills UMC where we saw so many wonderful friends who all loved on Luke.  He is one lucky little boy.

So I have 2.5 weeks before I go back to work.  I plan on making the absolute most of the time I've got left, but more importantly, I plan on making the most of the time I spend with my son and my husband each and every day - regardless of work or anything else that requires my time.

1 comment:

Grammy Chambers said...

Proud of you as you learn to be flexible . Very hard for people who are extremely organized in their thinking . I remember you asking me if a mother instinct kicks in when you have a baby. It did and now you know what it means to love a child. I'm happy that I will be able to pick him up from school on occasion. And I hope we will get to love on him frequently on weekends.